Enjoy to the End

Just listening to this music inspires me. Right now I'm listening to "Sail Away" by a girl from Liverpool who writes songs because it is what she loves to do. It's the most beautiful thing. To know what I'm talking about, you have to experience the music. This girl isn't famous, she's not paid millions, and she's not a million years old with the wisdom of someone who's been writing music for the public for years and years.

She's got what I want so badly. The capacity to CREATE beauty through music. Me? I can only sing it. I illustrate what composers intend me to illustrate. I don't write the notes from my own life and experiences. Which is what makes me so...disposable when it comes to beauty.

But I'm not giving up completely. Maybe someday I'll be able to produce a song that's parallel to my heart. I thank the Lord for the elegance of a melody. For giving me something that can paint emotions the way few can do with words.

I take great pride in reproducing those divine messages. I'm far from where I want to be but I am elated for the gift that I and so many others have of singing the delicate and exquisite expressions that we can.

Inspiration for this story was given me by: Jennifer Rafferty. Look her up on Youtube. My personal favorite is "Sail Away". I adore it.

Ok, so writing these notes isn't exactly new to me, but it's something that I have little patience for. So much to say so little time to say it ALL. Plus, I can't type it out in the same speed that I think of it! But I'm gonna try to give it another chance.

So...I've had some really strong feelings lately. Feelings of joy, of gratitude, anticipation, excitement, just WONDERFUL feelings that I have managed to live with out for far too long-- I have no idea how. Every little thing brings me joy! For Example:

Tonight, I had a date with a GREAT guy. And even though it was a first date we had some fantastic conversation, him being so personable and easy-going. But I hadn't realized how much I needed to talk about those kinds of things OUT LOUD rather than to myself, or mulling it all over in my head. It was extremely nice. And it allowed me to really search my thoughts for the first time in...I honestly don't know how long. And I also had the chance to have a pleasant time without having to search heart and soul. Just something to have fun doing. Both! And it gives me a feeling of gratitude for that chance, as small and menial as it may seem. Take joy in the little things, right?

Hmm. Joy in the little things, good advice. How else do we humans find meaning in our existence? Our religion, which for some of us IS life, our family, our friends, the sun that comes up in the morning, the music that accentuates the flow of day-to-day. You name it. My heart swells with the smallest things now. And I owe it all to the Lord who has given me that religion, who placed me in my lovely family, who put the friends that bless my life in my particular path, who shines the sun down on me day after day, and who writes the music for the playlist that fills my life. He is the author of my story which is at a wonderful climax. :) He writes my happy ending even before I've gone through the mud that life drags us all through.

Do I have a disclaimer about the dreamy mush that this whole note is about? No, I definitely do not. Because these words don't do justice in expressing all of this. For the first time in I think forever I honestly believe that I am beautiful and I can say that without feeling cocky because It's not vain at all for anyone to say (in the right way). And that Life is wonderful.

So give God the time of day. Love someone who isn't easy to love. Dance to a song with a good beat ;). Hug someone or, heck, give them a kiss on the cheek!!!

Give their lives a little pinch of the blessing that God has to offer through you.

And thank someone for theirs.

"Remember. The end will always justify the pain it took to get us there."